Thoughts. On this blog, and in my writing in general, things can become dark. I do what I can to introduce something positive, something to offset the dark thoughts. I don't know how to introduce the positive sometimes, feeling that I would not be genuine for you, my Reader, at certain moments. Every post I have blogged is a way to release tension, angst, pain, sadness... the list goes on. It's a method, also, of creating something out of my darkness instead of letting the darkness implode and do some serious damage, as it has before. I'm not afraid of the darkness, but I know how deadly it is when it's not channeled into something helpful. I see it as one of the most powerful creative mediums available to me. It's a dark energy. I have to do something with it. When I'm in mental pain, I often form a mental scene of angels gathering around and laying soothing hands on my pained soul. Angels, to me, are spirit children of my Heavenly Father- and as such, are my brothers and sisters. I think that imagining heavenly help is not a crime, but an active belief in, and enabler of, real miracles. I certainly believe in those.
I believe that we are miracles, the greatest miracles God has ever performed. You, O Reader, are a miracle. Maybe you already know that, or perhaps you've never considered it before, or maybe you are in the process. I knew it so long ago, yet chose to disregard it or even reject it at times. My darkness was so powerful even then. The fact that I am alive to type this is incredibly strong evidence that miracles are real and active, in my life and also in yours. Drawing the curtain over my own life is something I wanted to do, so many times. I wonder if you have, or if someone close to you has wanted to. I don't expect an overwhelming influx of replies to this post, but I know that there are many in this world who would like an early exit. To say it simply, I want you to live. I do. I do not want to live on this planet alone. If you need or want an outlet, I invite you to respond to this post. You are more than welcome, and if what's inside you is killing you, I beg you to do so.
Adam Scott Campbell
Dear Adam,
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to be at peace when the world we live in is full of darkness, turmoil, contention, and commotion. It is difficult to not absorb that energy within ourselves. Life's experiences are not always easy to deal with, and can throw us out of balance.
Here are a few lines I penned many years ago:
Sweet are their dreams,
Light are their hearts,
Quiet are their minds,
Deep is their peace.
If you choose to reflect on them, I hope they help disperse the darkness.
With love...
Dear Pops, you're right. It's so very difficult to find that peace. I have found it at certain moments, though. Like your words say, "Light are their hearts, Quiet are their minds". Two required criteria. Another couple lines from someplace else say "The world within determines the world without. Winners win because they do not doubt." A quiet mind and light heart within. I guess that's really what I'm seeking. Thanks. Adam
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